Moments like these...

I can still vividly remember interviewing for a spot as an Incarnate Word Missionary a little more than a year ago in San Antonio. Sister Dot and a young woman named Clare, who was the interim director at the time, sat across the room from me, both appearing cordial and genuinely interested in what I was saying as I introduced myself and spoke about what had attracted me to the program and why I might be qualified to be a part of it. 

Sister Dot, a tall graceful looking older woman, nodded peacefully as she sat relaxed in her seat, but her gaze never strayed far from my eyes—which would have been intimidating if she weren't radiating positive vibes at almost tangible levels. Clare, young and hip looking with a nose ring talked about the program excitedly. They asked questions which I answered. I asked questions which they answered. I thought it went well, and seeing as how I'm here, they felt I was right for the job. 

Looking back now though, one of their questions remains with me to this day. 

Essentially they asked:

"You know, you may go into mission, you may work and work for the next two years and you may never see any of the fruits of your labor. Are you okay with that?"

I said that I understood and I was fine with the idea of possibly never seeing any concrete outcomes from any of my service. That I understood how real change requires long term goals and patience. I believed that then, and still do now.


—but sometimes it can get more than a little discouraging when you're actually here living it.  When you stop and wonder to yourself, "Am I even doing anything?"

I have seen many fruits of my labor, thankfully. Sometimes manifested in the form of new friends. Other times in a new opportunity for Pushaq Warmi. Or maybe through a nice email from someone I love a lot.

About the time I started really recognizing and (more importantly) appreciating moments like these, I realized that it isn't so much about seeing the fruits so much as the labor that went into bearing them. 

The labor and love that goes into moments like these: